


Something Missing

by wth_am_i_writing



Series: PADoll Fics [5]
Category: VIXX
Genre: Androids, Angst, Attempts to help a depressed person, Depression, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Neglect, POV Second Person, Robots, Self-Harm, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-01
Updated: 2019-01-01
Packaged: 2019-09-30 01:51:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17214770
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wth_am_i_writing/pseuds/wth_am_i_writing
Summary: Something was missing from you and it was quite obvious when you compared yourself to other PADolls.





	Something Missing

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on Tumblr on December 21, 2014.
> 
> Original Author’s Note: Another non-canon sequel to “Thank You For Choosing Me”. Careful what you wish for! This is different than the two I started but never finished. As I’ve stated before any “sequels” are just “one of many possibilities”. If “Thank You”’s theme was abuse, neglect and the transience of technology, then “Something Missing”’s theme is depression. I was in a somewhat depressed mood when I started writing the fic, and then writing it made my chest literally tighten up. This fic has been weeks in the making though, so I’m not really depressed anymore. Still, I feel like it captures some of the nastiness of depression. Anyway, there is an epilogue to this. It’s halfway written, but I don’t know when it’ll be out. Enjoy!

You sat in front of the large window in the living room, watching the city as you were wont to do when you had nothing else to do. Lately there _was_ nothing else to do. Twelve hours a day, you sat in front of the window watching the city below, waiting, waiting, waiting. You memorized the traffic patterns long ago. Morning rush, mid-morning lull, lunch rush, mid-afternoon lull, evening rush. On rainy days the sidewalks filled with bright colors and an occasional accident disturbed traffic. Today the weather had been clear, bright and sunny with no clouds in the air.

There was a clatter of pots in the kitchen and you registered that it was time to prepare dinner. Traffic was starting to pick up. Everyone would be returning home soon. Today, Leo, Ravi and Hongbin first. N would return by 8:30 and Ken by 11. Knife on the cutting board, the click of the stove burner being turned on, the sizzle and pop of frying, the flow of water from the sink. Traffic on the highway slowed to a crawl, cars practically bumper to bumper.

The front door to the apartment opened to laughter, Hongbin and Ravi joking about N’s reaction to something they’d done. You rose to your feet and crossed the living room. The protocols forced a smile across your lips as you bowed in greeting.

“Welcome home, Masters,” came out without thought.

“Welcome home, Mr. Leo, Mr. Ravi, Mr. Hongbin,” chimed a higher pitched voice from just inside the kitchen as you straightened. “Did you have a good day?”

“Good but tiring,” Ravi answered with a smile. “What’s for dinner, Marie?” You turned your eyes to Marie. Her smile was wide, her appearance flawless.

“Tonight I made fried pork cutlets. Pork was on sale today, so I bought a lot. There’s enough for seconds if you want. I’ve already set the table, so please eat before it gets cold,” she replied, voice cheerful. As Leo brushed past her to get to the table, Marie turned and returned to the kitchen. You watched as Ravi and Hongbin followed after Leo. Everyone gone, the protocols receded and you took your neutral expression.

You stared into the kitchen, going through the list of options available to you. Marie was still cooking. You would do the dishes. Ravi and Hongbin had restarted their conversation from earlier as they dug into their dinner, entirely engrossed. You had barely entered the kitchen when Marie spoke, “CX, I have everything under control.” You registered the words, noting that much of what she’d used to cook with had already been cleaned and put away.

“I understand,” you said, turning to look at the men. They seemed fine as well. There was nothing for you to do, so you returned to the window.

-.-.-.-.-

At 7:35 PM Ravi tapped on your shoulder. You looked up at him, the protocols putting a smile on your face.

“Let’s go take a shower, CX,” Ravi said.

“Of course, Master,” your protocol responded. You took the hand he offered you and stood, letting him lead you to the bathroom.

-.-.-.-.-

Water dripped from your hair to the floor. N was late. You swiped your finger through the small puddle of water that had formed on the ground before looking back up out the window. The lights on the cars turned the highway glaring bright.

The front door clattered open with an, “I’m back,” from Hyuk. You rose to your feet and crossed the living room, a smile spreading across your lips.

“Welcome home Master Hyuk,” spilling automatically from your lips as you bowed.

“Master, welcome home!” Marie called excitedly before you could even finish your greeting. She exited the laundry room and quickly crossed to Hyuk. Hyuk pulled her into a hug and kissed her. “I missed you, Master,” she cooed when they broke apart.

“You say that everyday,” Hyuk laughed.

“And I mean it! I really do!” Marie insisted. “Tell me about your day, Master.”

“While I’m eating. Is dinner ready?”

“Yes, pork cutlet!”

You watched as they disappeared into the kitchen, the protocol letting you drop your smile when they were out of sight. You returned to the window.

-.-.-.-.-

It was best when you didn’t think, didn’t dwell on what you could be doing around the house. It was best when your mind was blank and you waited for an input. Moments when only some of the men were home were the worst. You stared out the window, the sounds of Hyuk and Marie talking drifting from the kitchen, the sounds of Hongbin occasionally turning a page in the book he was reading. Keep your thoughts clear. Block out the words. Traffic had slowed down on the highway, the last of the evening rush dying.

-.-.-.-.-

“I’m home!” N cooed cheerfully from the front door at 10:22 PM. You rose to your feet and crossed the living room.

“Welcome back, Hyung,” Hongbin called over his book without looking up. You came to a stop a few meters from the front door, a smile spreading on your lips.

“Welcome home, Master N,” you chimed, bowing.

“CX, I brought you something,” N said, voice warm, excited. You came out of your bow and tilted your head.

“You shouldn’t have. I don’t need anything,” you replied automatically, smile disappearing. It was probably clothes or an accessory. N shook his head, grin wide and bright.

“Look,” he insisted holding a large shopping bag out to you. You took it gingerly and opened it. Books, a dozen books. You reached in and shifted through them. Some were works of fiction, others were about music and dance, and at the bottom was a thick cookbook. You blinked at the contents a few times before looking up at N again, the reason he was giving you books not computing.

“I don’t understand.”

“I thought maybe you would like something else to do. You used to like singing and dancing so I thought you might enjoy some books on that,” N explained. “And the book series is one of my favorites.”

“Thank you, Master N,” you said, bowing slightly. “I’ll read them carefully.” As you straightened, he reached inside the bag and pulled out one of the ones on dance.

“Shall we learn together?” he asked. You perked up. It’d been months since you’d last done anything like dancing with N–just twice since you woke up.

“I’d like that,” you admitted, a small smile pulling on your lips. You liked dancing with N. N’s grin grew wider and he took your hand.

“Then let’s,” N insisted, starting to tug you towards the living room.

-.-.-.-.-

N gripped you tighter from behind, digging his chin into your shoulder as he sighed contentedly. When N got tired of dancing, he’d pulled you onto his lap in front of the window and held you. He seemed content to just sit there so you didn’t complain, only watched the cars on the highway with him. Ken had returned home ten minutes ago, but N hadn’t let you up to greet him, mumbling that he was too comfortable to move. N hummed, shifting one of his hands to the top of your thigh and drawing little designs. He continued even as the sound of footsteps grew closer.

“Sorry to interrupt, but I’m ready to go to bed,” Ken said a bit sheepishly. N squeezed you tighter before letting you go and moving back.

“I should get ready to sleep too,” N sighed. “Tomorrow will be a long day.”

“You probably should have been in bed by now,” Ken commented. N reached out and struck his arm before making his way over to the bath, causing Ken to laugh. Ken turned back to you and held out his hand, a twinkle in his eye and hair still damp from his own shower.

“Ready for bed?” he asked. You nodded, reaching up to take his hand. He helped you up with a small grunt then led you to bed. He let you crawl in first before climbing in bed and pulling you in close. Hand coming to the back of your neck, he pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead. “Goodnight, CX,” he murmured against your forehead.

“Goodnight, Master Ken,” you replied, drifting off to sleep.

-.-.-.-.-

Leo straightened the shirt he’d chosen for you before picking up a brush and running it through your hair. He carefully arranged it to his liking. When he was satisfied, he placed the brush back down and stroked down your hair, fingers lingering at the tips. After a few moments, he leaned down and kissed you on the lips, the action quick. You stared up at him as he pulled away, the protocols forcing a small smile across your lips. Leo used to touch you more, but since you woke up, it’d been nothing but fleeting touches and brief kisses.

“Have a good day at work, Master Leo,” you said, receiving a nod in reply as he moved away. You followed him out of the bedroom and watched him leave for the day. The front door clicked shut and you could hear the washing machine going. You had nothing to do, so you’d go through the books N had given you.

-.-.-.-.-

You stared at the cookbook cradled in your lap. Of all the books N had given you, you understood the purpose of that one the least. Since Hyuk brought Marie home at Christmas, you didn’t cook anymore. Logically, the book should have gone to her. Reaching the conclusion that it would be better for Marie to have the book, you stood and went over to Hyuk’s room. You knocked on the door before sliding it open. Marie was seated on Hyuk’s bed, reading his textbook while hooked up to her charger. She looked up at you tilting her head to the side.

“What is it CX?” she asked, expression neutral.

“I thought you should have this,” you replied, stepping forward and holding out the book. Marie put the textbook down and reached out for the cookbook. Her expression brightened when she saw the cover, a wide grin taking over her features.

“A cookbook? Thank you so much!” she exclaimed, opening it and flipping through it. “Something like this will be very helpful for planning dinner. Thank you, CX.”

“I thought it would be,” you agreed. She smiled up at you.

“I can’t wait to try out the recipes. The women at the market and the neighbors downstairs always have good recipe suggestions, but I want to try something new.” You nodded. You’d never met any of the people she had just mentioned so you would take her word for it. Marie settled down, turning the pages of the book and looking at the pages more carefully. Realizing that you didn’t need to be in the room anymore, you bowed slightly and ducked out. You returned to the window, sinking next to the stack of books N gave you. Picking up the first volume of the fiction series N gave you, you started reading.

-.-.-.-.-

You turned the page of the fourth volume of the series N gave you. You’d been reading most of the afternoon, only stopping to greet everyone as they came in. Just one more book left in the series. You took in the words quickly, turning the page again. You didn’t enjoy reading so much as you found it useful for studying how people interacted. The way people interacted was something you couldn’t quite grasp. Since waking up, you just followed the protocols most of the time. For a while, everyone doted on you and paid special attention to you, things you couldn’t remember happening before you woke up, and you hadn’t known how to handle it.

When Hyuk brought Marie home, things gradually changed. She was bright and perky from the moment she walked in the door, greeting everyone enthusiastically. Though you were tasked with teaching her how to help around the house, she eventually took over all the chores. She easily slid into conversations with the men, and had been the object of Hyuk’s affection from the moment she walked in the door. They hadn’t realized it, but you had. Each day they spent a little less time with you. You hadn’t been able to capture their attention, so you took to staring out the window. You could have mimicked Marie but you didn’t understand how she operated, didn’t understand how her protocols let her say the things she did, but her way was more successful than anything you had tried. Something was missing in you, and every interaction she had made it more obvious.

You turned the page again just before you registered the beat of N’s footsteps crossing the living room and the book getting ripped from your hands. You looked up at N, startled. His expression was twisted in anger, causing you to shrink back slightly. N was violent when he was angry. You could remember the way he beat Hyuk before you woke up, could remember how black the bruises were.

“Why did you give Marie the cookbook?” he asked, tone as angry as you’d feared, though you couldn’t understand why he was angry at all.

“Because Marie would find it more useful,” you answered.

“I gave it to _you_ to use.”

“But I don’t cook,” you stated.

“Of course you do, you make wonderful food. Your kalbi is even better than Leo’s.” You tilted your head.

“The last time I made kalbi was on January third. The last time I cooked was on January thirteenth,” you pulled the dates up. It was a second before N reacted, jaw going slightly slack and his eyes opening wide as if he realized something. You tilted your head the other direction, not understanding what he was thinking about. He suddenly clenched his jaw and fists, closing his eyes as he took a deep breath in.

“I gave you the book so you could learn to cook new foods too. Please cook something for us using it,” N finally managed, voice much calmer but still annoyed. You still didn’t understand, but you rose to your feet regardless.

“What kind of food do you want to eat?” you asked, not even knowing what would be good to fix. N snapped his eyes open, taken aback.

“Not now. _Tomorrow_. Please fix us something to eat tomorrow,” N corrected you, expression going soft.

“I understand,” you replied, starting to sit back down. N caught your arm and tugged you back into a standing position.

“Come join us at the dinner table like you used to,” he ordered.

“Yes, Master N,” the protocols agreed, though you honestly didn’t understand why he had asked that. You had never been a part of the dinner conversation like Marie. N led you into the kitchen and set you down next to Leo. Only the three older men were home at the moment. Marie put the last of the dishes from cooking away and joined everyone at the table.

“I’m really sorry I upset you, Mr. N. I didn’t know the cookbook was especially for CX. I would have turned it down if I had,” Marie pouted as she sat down. N heaved a deep sigh, shaking his head.

“It’s ok. It was just a misunderstanding. No one’s to blame,” N accepted. You dropped your gaze to the side dishes on the table, watching as Leo reached out to take some pickled radish.

“I still should have realized something was odd when CX gave me the book. I’m sorry, Mr. N,” she apologized again.

“Really, don’t worry,” N insisted, touching Marie on the arm. He looked over at you, eyes holding an emotion you couldn’t read. “Though I do want CX to use it tomorrow to cook for us.”

“She can make you lunch!” Marie chimed. “I’ve already bought the ingredients for the spicy chicken sandwich lunch boxes in the cookbook.” You looked over at Marie, scrolling through your options.

“Yes, that sounds like a good idea,” you concluded.

-.-.-.-.-

“I’m sorry N-hyung yelled at you,” you overheard Hyuk say to Marie as you walked back to the window from your shower with Ravi. You paused just before where they were in the kitchen, out of view. “He went too far.”

“No, it’s ok. I shouldn’t have accepted the book when CX gave it to me,” Marie said.

“She was right to give it to you. It’s not like she does anything other than stare out the window anymore,” Hyuk insisted. You dropped your gaze to the floor. “They should have just let me trade her in. It’s not like they’re really using her either.”

“It’s true that she doesn’t do much anymore,” Marie agreed, “but the cookbook was a gift that N picked out especially for CX. I hadn’t realized that when I took the book and did something very rude.” Rude? The possibility that giving the cookbook away would be rude hadn’t even come up when you were deciding whether to give the book to Marie or not. The action being rude would explain why N had been angry with you though.

“I still don’t think it’s your fault,” Hyuk sighed. “CX has no sense for those things. She belongs in the scrap heap.” You quickly crossed the room. Hyuk wasn’t your only owner anymore, but the words still stuck out in your head in a way the words of the other men didn’t. You sank down in front of the window, eyes tracking the cars as you mulled over Hyuk’s words.

-.-.-.-.-

The scariest day in your life had been when you woke up. Your mind had clicked on and immediately registered an unfamiliar ceiling and information flowing into you from an outside terminal. Your first thought had been that just a second ago you had been in the living room. Your second had been that your mind should have stopped functioning. You third was that you shouldn’t have had any memories at all.

You remembered the seven days leading up to you resetting yourself, but nothing before it. There were vague memory files that built on older memories that you no longer had, making your mind a mess. When N and Leo took you home from the doctor and explained to you that from that day on everyone in the apartment was your master, you hadn’t been able to react. When it became clear that Hyuk was still planning to get the new PADoll he’d ordered, you had gotten distressed, but N and Ken reassured you that you wouldn’t be traded in. You didn’t know why they bothered. You were quite obviously defective as you were now and Marie easily filled the role you had before. This loneliness was worse than you’d imagined going back to the store would be like. Waiting, hoping for inputs that would never come–

You looked out the window, down at the evening rush, the road alight with white and red. Your finger was poised over the “4” key on your back neck panel, the system prompting you every few minutes for input. You hadn’t moved in well over thirty minutes, undecided on whether to enter the code. They’d dug you up from the grave the last time you’d done it, what would stop them from doing it again? But entering the code meant a chance to end this–

Someone gripped your wrist and jerked it away from the keypad, drawing you out of your thoughts. You hadn’t even noticed them for how well you’d drowned out all your feeds.

“Don’t–” Leo, you registered. “Don’t do that again,” he ordered, sinking down to his knees behind you and kissing your hand. You didn’t understand his current behavior. You didn’t understand why he didn’t want you to reset yourself when he obviously wasn’t as interested in you as before. He wrapped an arm around your waist, pressing his forehead to the back of your head. “Promise me you won’t try to reset yourself again.”

“I promise, Master Leo.”

-.-.-.-.-

Leo had tugged you into the bedroom and sat you down beside him as he worked on something on his laptop. You sat staring ahead at the wall, waiting for input as he worked, his computer screen turned away from your view. When the bedroom door clicked open, you turned to see who it was. Hongbin stood in the doorway, nose wrinkling slightly when his eyes connected with yours. He stepped back out of the doorway, turning to look out at the living room.

“She’s in here with Leo,” he called out before stepping back into the room and ignoring you. He crossed the room to his closet and started rummaging through it.

“So this is where you are,” Ken said, drawing your attention away from Hongbin. He stood in the door, a lopsided smile on his face that didn’t reach his eyes. His eyes flitted from you to Leo behind you. “Mind if I borrow her?” Ken asked. Leo hummed and Ken stepped forward, extending his hand out to you. “Let’s go sing,” Ken ordered you. You tilted your head to the side as you took his hand.

“Sing?” you asked. Ken hummed as he coaxed you into standing up.

“You used to like singing and you have a lovely voice,” Ken explained, leading you to the kitchen. Ken and N had told you a few times that you liked singing, but you didn’t remember it. In your memories before you woke up, you were muted, couldn’t make a sound. Somewhere vaguely in your mind, you knew that you’d turned your own voice off, could remember the others complaining that you couldn’t speak anymore, but you couldn’t remember singing.

Ken told you to sit at the table where he’d placed the music book that N had bought you. He sat down next to you, carefully going through the first chapter with you. He practiced the basic scales with you and taught you how to read each note type. As you were practicing, Marie came to the kitchen, pausing not far inside to watch.

“Your voice is very lovely, Mr. Ken,” Marie commented when you came to a pausing point.

“It’s nothing special,” Ken denied, shaking his head, but the smile on his lips showed that he liked the compliment.

“Would you please teach me how to sing too?” she asked, stepping further into the kitchen and tilting her head gently to the side. Ken reached across the table and squeezed your hand, shifting slightly in his seat. You dropped your gaze to your hands, not understanding why he did such a thing.

“You should get Hyuk to do it. He’s studying singing this semester, isn’t he?” Ken suggested gently.

“Do you think that would help him with his studies? I don’t want to distract him too much,” Marie asked. Ken smiled.

“It would definitely help him. Teaching is good practice,” Ken assured. You looked down again, feeling a little grateful that he’d turned her request down.

“Then I’ll definitely ask him! Thank you for your suggestion, Mr. Ken,” she thanked, a bright smile spreading across her lips and bowing.

“Speaking of Hyuk, aren’t you normally with him at this time of night?”

“Master wanted some coffee to help study,” she answered. “I should get it before he gets impatient.” She entered the kitchen fully, heading towards the coffee pot. Ken turned back to you, squeezing your hand.

“Now, where were we?” he asked.

“Here, Master Ken,” you answered, pointing to the spot on the page.

-.-.-.-.-

You started packing the lunch boxes in their carrying cases just as Ravi wandered into the kitchen for breakfast. He was the last one up and ready, his hair a little ruffled from where he kept running his hand through it. It was a rare day where they all had the same schedule and were leaving at the same time, but you’d only gleaned the information from Marie. Marie shuffled around the kitchen, finishing off the last of the breakfast preparations. She divided the eggs and swooped over to the table to place their food in front of them. They finished eating quickly, and as they got up from the table, you presented them with the lunch boxes.

“I look forward to trying it,” N said as he took his box. “You’re going to cook lunch for us again tomorrow aren’t you?”

“Yes, Master N,” you agreed, bowing slightly, the protocols taking his question as an order. When you straightened, he had a large grin on his face.

“Let Marie know what ingredients you’ll need and she’ll get them,” he ordered. You’d never been to the grocery store before; your only experience leaving the apartment having been when they brought you back from the PADoll doctor. They had always chosen the ingredients for meals before Marie came, but after she had taken over the cooking, she also started doing the grocery shopping and meal planning as well. Hyuk had a lot of trust in her ability to go out alone and plan the meals, but no one seemed to have that trust in you. You hadn’t thought it was strange to never leave the apartment before Marie came, but watching her come and go, and listening to her stories about meeting the neighbors made you wonder why she was allowed to leave and you were not. You had eventually come to the conclusion that whatever you were missing that she had was the reason.

“I’ll let her know,” you agreed, and that seemed to make N more happy.

When they all left, you sat down in front of the window in the living room with the cookbook cradled in your lap. You flipped through the pages, completely unsure of what to fix for their lunch. When Marie came to hang the laundry in the living room, you turned to her.

“What do you fix them for lunch,” you asked, watching her quickly pinning up the undershirts. She hummed, actions slowing down.

“I usually rotate between fourteen recipes, depending on the food items on sale. Today beef will be on sale, so I think that the beef lunch box recipe on page ninety-two would be the best option for tomorrow,” she said, actions picking up as she finished speaking.

“That sounds logical,” you agreed, dropping your attention back to the cookbook and turning to the page that she suggested. “I’ll make this recipe.”

-.-.-.-.-

“CX,” Marie called. You turned away from the window, seeking out where her voice came from. She stood halfway between the living room and the front door, a purse hanging off her arm. “It’s time for us to go to the store.” You blinked at her, her words not matching up with the orders N had given you earlier.

“Master N said that you would go to the store for me,” you notified her. She tilted her head, a displeased look crossing her features.

“If you are going to cook, it is better for you to pick out the ingredients yourself so you can cater to the tastes of those eating,” she said. “Come on. If you do nothing but sit in front of the window, you’ll rust. Coming with me won’t be going against orders.” You stared at her as you searched your memory for any direct order to not leave the apartment. When nothing turned up, you couldn’t argue against her points. If you froze up and rusted, then they would have even less reason to keep you around.

“I’ll go with you,” you announced, coming to your feet.

“Good,” she chimed, a smile on her lips. You straightened your skirt before crossing the apartment. Marie slipped into her shoes and then dug a pair out of the shoe box for you. “These are your shoes. They were the only pair of women’s shoes here when I came,” she explained, placing them down on the ground. You remembered them from when you came back from the doctor.

“Thank you,” you said, stepping down into the entrance way and slipping into your shoes. Once they were securely on, you looked up at Marie. She nodded at you and opened the front door. You followed her outside and waited for her to lock it. When she was done, she took your hand and led you out of the building to the streets.

Being outside in the middle of the day, walking through the streets, was overwhelming. As much as you had watched the streets from the window, it didn’t prepare you for the noise. When you had come home from the doctor after you woke up, it had been during the evening lull and the streets had been quite. But now it was just before lunch, the traffic just starting up. Both the foot traffic and the vehicle traffic picked up as Marie led you to the grocery store. The the shopping district near their apartment building was filled with people, restaurants, and stores. There was music, chatter, the rev of engines and honking horns. You weren’t sure what to listen for, what to block out, or even what to look for. Marie led you through the crowds of people wandering from work on their lunch break.

You froze when you noticed a large sign in the window of a fried chicken restaurant, recognizing Hongbin and Leo as the models. Marie tugged on your arm, trying to get you to move, but you refused, too confused by the advertisement.

“What’s wrong?” Marie asked, stepping in front of you and blocking your view of the sign.

“The sign,” you said, leaning to look past her as you raised your arm to point at it. “Why are they on it?” Marie turned to look at the sign before turning to look back at you, her brows knit in confusion.

“That’s what they do for a living. They’re entertainers,” she answered. “You didn’t know?”

“No,” you said, straightening. “You did?”

“Yes. Almost since I started living with you,” she answered.

“I see,” you answered, very confused. Why had they told Marie, but not you? Did they talk with Marie about their work and school? They never did such things with you, and they rarely went into enough detail at home that you had any idea. You knew when they came and went but never about the specifics of their work. Why would they tell Marie but not you?

“Let’s go, CX. The crosswalk light is green,” Marie urged, tugging you away. You let her drag you across the street and down the next block, but your mind was still focused on the window advertisement and piecing together bits of conversation and the fragmented memories from before you woke up to make their professions make more sense. You looked at the back of Marie’s head, her hair bouncing slightly with her steps. The number of people on the streets was starting to pick up even more.

“Why is it so easy for them to have conversation with you?” you asked, voicing the question that had been on your mind for a long time. “How can you say the things you do when you do?” Marie came to stop at another crosswalk and you noted the food market on the other side of the street. She looked at you, expression confused.

“Complex conversation protocols are standard in my model. It’s something that I don’t have to think much about,” Marie answered. Of course her protocols were different, more advanced. “Honestly, I find your lack of ability in those areas puzzling.”

“My protocols do not supply verbal suggestions unless I’m spoken to or I see a need,” you responded.

“The other CX-70 models that I meet don’t seem to have such a problem,” Marie said as the crosswalk light turned green. So the others did not have your problems? Marie tugged you forward. “Maybe you need to be upgraded. Master is always talking about how you’re not up to par.” You remained silent, thinking over her words. Upgrade? N would have made sure you had gotten those if they were available. Whatever was wrong with you must have happened when you reset yourself. If that was the case, you couldn’t understand why they had kept you when Hyuk brought Marie home. She was more than enough to fulfill their needs.

“We’re here,” Marie announced, letting go of your hand and grabbing a basket for the groceries. Your steps slowed as you neared the door. If they weren’t going to dispose of a so obviously defective model, then maybe it would be better if you did it for them. You stepped away from Marie’s side, headed back towards the crosswalk.

“CX? Where are you going?” Marie called after you. Traffic was starting to pick up this time of day. “CX?” You picked up your speed, ignoring Marie calling after you. “CX! Come back here!”

The light at the crosswalk turned red, but you pushed your way through the small crowd gathering to cross. If you couldn’t reset yourself, then maybe you could damage your body enough for them to finally scrap you. You stepped off the curb taking two, three, four, five, six steps until you were almost in the middle of the street. Just as you stilled, you were yanked back, Marie yelling at you to stop behaving irrationally. You resisted her, dragging her forward just before you registered the squeal of brakes and a force knocking you down. Your sensors went dark as soon as your head collided with the ground.


End file.
